wrecked.

To her:
Just as i chose to face you and continue helping you with the housework,
you chose to run away and maintain your "queen" position.
if you know how to quieten down,
if you know how to speak properly,
if you know how to just lower your tone by that tiny little bit,
everything will be fine.
everyone have their temper,
not only you.
if you can start shouting at me because of an misunderstanding,
why cant i shout back to get my reasons heard?
and if you think you can maintain your arrogant posture,
go ahead,
because only your nice sons/ daughter and your GREAT husband will stand by you.
oh yea, and maybe your beloved, excellence in everything grand-daughter will stay with you too~
for i dont give a damn..
and i am not going to apologise.

how much risk can i take?
how long have i tolerate?
i am 19 yo.
not the 12 yo kid u used to control.
since you can point out the mistake yourself
why cant you change yourself?!
since you know where are ur bad points
why dont you rectify them yourself?!
why must you even point out that you can spot your own problem and still argue that you are not wrong?!
is there such thing as 'fairness' in you?
i really don't understand.
but forget it,
i dont want to understand anyway.
i had enough,
wasting tears on a person who doesnt change.

to all my friends in school, especially nicolette and elisse and grace:
i know my attitude has been very bad recently.
i am very sorry.
that's why i chose to leave during break,
to break off the awkwardness,
to find time to reflect.
hanging on for so long,
i end up still shouting back.
i just wanted myself to be heard too.
but she refuse to listen.
and she and i ended up quarrelling.
if my emotionals will affect you all,
stay away from me.
for i wont and i can't blame anyone,
that it's my own fault for being unable to control myself.
i believe there is no point again,
ranting to all of you,
because even i find myself so irritating and a nuisance now.
like a weakling who only knows how to cry and throw temper.
i am sorry, sincerely.

to darling and him:
thanks for being there for me.
there is too much which i need to say, and i know i dont hv to blog it here.
and i need to say sorry too,
for my mood swing,
for my nonsense.
thank you for trying to cheer me up too.

i know i need you people's help.
but i chose to stand up on my own.
for this is a family problem,
which no one can help to resolve.

<3

6:48 PM ·