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hello, chanwanting♥ here. 22yo this year. a gal who is trying hard to change herself to get a better life..


Exam Time Table




Bituwin - template
Dementee - image

Words from Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls.

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Saturday, October 29, 2011
Definition

Someone, please help me define 'more than friends'...

Tyvm

<3

Friday, October 28, 2011
Sorry...

No why= because there is a reason which i cant tell u...

Please forgive me for being so selfish..

<3

Sunday, October 23, 2011

I really hate that fucking attitude of urs... How nice to be able to get approval by everyone huh. Just get busy with all ur studying n dating k.

Thursday, October 13, 2011
Curiousity

Sometimes, i wish to be able to look through your heart and see the real you. It sucks to be playing guessing game. Sometimes i think i sucks as a friend, not worth your time, even when i try to do my best.

说是「微笑」,不如说是「掩饰」
说是「放下」,不如说是「放手」
说是「理由」,不如说是「借口」
说是「特别」,不如说是「缺点」
说是「羡慕」,不如说是「嫉妒」

There is something i concluded: i have gotten one of the best-est friend in this world (: she's one of the kind-est, nicest, most amazing person i ever met in these 20 years of my life. Sometimes i'll wonder, why did she chose me as fren... I hope she's happy forever.

<3

Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Tears

眼泪不该为那种理由而流。

<3

Sunday, October 9, 2011
live or leave

i let you into my heart,
but i was the one who let you leave too.
not because i forced you out, 
but simply because you want to..
so i respect your decision.


of course, i wouldn't deny about liking you.
i don't use the word 'love' because i dont know the definition behind it.
i'm not like some girls who do their best to chase a guy,
i'm not as daring, not as brave.

let me smile through the days i have left..
by making everyone around me happy,
by making everyone around me smile,
by making everyone around me be at their best.

smiling on the surface, i mastered it.
within my 20 years of life,
i learnt to tolerate, to talk back,
to refuse, to rebuke, to give in.
this is my family,
i didnt choose it, neither can i choose it
'willingly' is the words
just because: you are my family..

school work is killing me :D
but i'm still going to school, to study :D
i want to hit my aim :D
i want to work hard with her :D
i want to make my family proud of me :D
i want to prove people wrong :D
i love myself :D

<3

Friday, October 7, 2011
cat attack!


moral of the story for today: don't feed cats with kueh buloh..

and: it is time to train up my stamina.. why? so that next time i can run faster if a cat tries to stalk/chase me again..

<3

Thursday, October 6, 2011
believing

有些事,可遇不可求。
但,有些事,不是白等就会到来的。
不努力,不改变,不进步,
又有谁会抬起头看你一眼?

but you never once know what am i really thinking.
even when i put it so clear and transparent in front of you.

does changing really helps?
if it does. let me know, and i will.
not totally, but at least the slightest bit whenever i can.
because i still want to be myself, the true self.

i'm not like other girls,
i dont giggle with the innocent eyes, i burst out laughing with through happiness.
i dont cry and expect a shoulder, i hate others feeling sad and sympatise me.
i seldom wear skirt, i wear jeans/shorts to walk naturally.
i seldom wear heels, i prefer comfortable shoes so that i can walking miles and miles with you.
i take initiative, i refuse to let chances and opportunities pass by me.
i dont have a perfect figure, i maintain my current situation and trying to get better.
i dont rely on guy, i believe in independence.

but i believe in something, and that is: i really like you..

<3